A divorce is an emotionally charged situation that can be very confusing and difficult for a child to process. As a parent, helping your child face the impending divorce is incredibly important. The following are tips to help your child during this difficult time.
1. Be honest, always.
Do not lie to your child by saying, “Dad is on a business trip” or, “nothing is wrong.” Let your child know that there are problems and give straightforward answers. Children are very perceptive and will notice if you are not being honest.
2. Do not belittle your soon-to-be ex-spouse in front of your child.
This can be confusing as the child is attached to both of you. It is also important to not drag your child into the middle of an argument. The problems leading to a divorce are between you and your spouse. Your child should not have to pick a side during an argument.
3. Ensure that your child knows they are loved.
Many children worry that because Mom and Dad don’t love each other, that mom and dad don’t love them. Make sure they know that no matter what happens, they are loved and will be taken care of.
4. Reassure your child that the divorce is not their fault.
It is common for children to assume that their parents are getting divorced because they did something bad. Explain to them that nothing they did influence the decision.
Children will have many questions about the divorce. They will also be dealing with their feelings, assumptions, and concerns. Be sure to take the time to let your child talk and express how they are feeling. Try not to interrupt. Be a good listener.
No one plans on petitioning for divorce when they choose to get married and have children but it happens. Use the tips from Holmes & Holmes to help your children with this transition. We can help with child custody and support cases. Finally, call us for a consultation.